Grrrrrrrrrr.....

Yes, that's a growl.
Yes, that's what I do when I am frustrated.
And boy, am I frustrated.
I had my financial aid meeting for Fall today. I need to come up with $6800 in order to attend summer and fall semesters. That's *after* financial aid. Ummmmm, hello? Did you not see on my FASFA where I indicated I have 3 dependents and I don't work and my husband doesn't make great money? I came home and immediately started filling out applications online and so far I have 3 denials under my belt. *sigh* I don't expect that things are going to change with further applications. I do have a few scholarship applications out there but certainly nothing I can count on. Sooooooo..... it looks like all this hard work to maintain a 4.0 GPA working towards my degree was in vain. It looks like I will NOT be the first person to obtain a college degree from my family afterall. I am SO disappointed. I feel like I was tricked. If I had known up front what my out of pocket expense would be at this point, I never would have started this journey. Now, I will face student loans to pay for classes that didn't earn me a degree. :(

Prior to this meeting this afternoon, I was planning to blog about how excited I was to have finished my Marketing paper. I also survived single-handedly making the presentation in class this morning... so much for a GROUP project, huh? One of my partners didn't even SHOW UP and the other refused to get up with me stating he had "nothing to say". I also just finished working up my Basics of Design final project and am pretty pleased with how it came out. It received Dylan's seal of approval and we all know how hard THAT is to get!

Girls Weekend was a blast! Hopefully I will get some layouts up soon! I can't wait until the professional photos from the beach photo shoot are online. You are gonna laugh your butts off when you see them! :)

Anyway, I need to get my carpet cleaner over to Auntie Barbara's since her kitten is giving her fits pooping downstairs. Have a great night!

Live from Maine...

We are having a great time....

*Scrapped 4 PAPER pages last night
*Had a glorious massage this morning
*Laughing my ass off :)

Oh my!

Every time I turn around, its something new! This weekend started off with a bang and then went downhill from there. Rather than put my energy into the negative, though, I am going to take Jen's cue and focus on the positive! So, my 5 things for today (in no particular order) are:
1. I am thankful that my blood pressure has been totally in control lately and I have been able to afford my medication.
2. I am thankful that I learned about certain situations NOW rather than later so I still have time to correct things before it's too late.
3. I am thankful that I have such a passionate friend even if that means she does now has a record.
4. I am thankful for the sunshine that rejuvenates me (and slows the use of costly pellets for heating).
5. I am thankful that tonight I will be packing for a super fun GIRLS WEEKEND with some of my very favorite peeps! :) I can't remember a time when I felt like I deserved this more.

I want a camp ground shower!

Oh my gosh, my girls take the LONGEST showers on the planet! I want a camp ground shower.... you know, the kind you put a quarter in and it shuts off after 5 minutes- then maybe my girls would understand the cost/shower equation! Wouldn't that be fun? They could earn money for showers by doing other chores? LOL

Speaking of camping, Scott's parents will be back in a month! They are hoping to make it back for Nicole's prom! I can't believe all the exciting events that will be happening this spring and summer with prom and graduation and Nicole heading off to the Marines plus all the regular stuff like LAX games and baseball games and a new semester at school!

Speaking of school, there are only a few weeks left to this semester so I better scoot and get working on my paper. Have a great night!

Tax Day!

Thanks for listening to me vent yesterday and for the emails and phone calls. The very best thing in life is having such great friends to cheer me when I am down. I certainly didn't think I would be able to laugh after as hard as I had been crying, but somehow you always manage to bring out the best in me.

My buddy Jen came over last night so I could do her taxes for her (nothing like waiting till the last minute, huh?) Thankfully they were quite simple. Thanks to a new haircut for her daughter and Megan's recent addition of bangs, it was a perfet night for a little photo shoot and we got some fun "girly" pictures!
ETA: Here is a picture of Megan with bangs:

Speaking of tax day, Polkdotpotato.com is hosting a TAX DAY SALE which means you can get 30% off all of my products today only right here! Check it out!

Have a great day! :)

If it's not one thing...

If it's not one thing, it's another. I think I am resigned to the idea that I don't know how to raise daughters. I thought being a young Mom would be to my benefit, that I would remember how it felt to be a teenager.... and I do! It hurt like hell! Fifteen was the worst year of my life... until now..... living it through the eyes of my daughter is even worse than living it myself. I feel helpless and hopeless... out of control. :( I just don't know what to do and needed to vent... too bad it doesn't make me feel better. :(

I love Thursdays!

I love Thursdays because I love school but I also love that at the end of the day, I know I am off for 5 days before classes start again! :) Today was a kind of useless day at school but it did give me the chance to get a little more work done on my marketing paper and also do my homework that is due through next week. I think I will start working on my final projects this weekend. I can't believe there are only 3 weeks left before finals!! This semester flew by!

So in case anyone has heard any rumors, I want to clarify up front that I am *NOT* having an affair with Jen's boyfriend or anyone else for that matter. The text message sent to me by Norm was a joke regarding the fact he is in massage therapy school and would be giving me a massage because he needs 125 hours of practice for school. In the first place, I am quite happily married. Second, I would never betray Jen like that. People who are doing wrong themselves should stop reading into things and fix their own issues!

Speaking of massages, I received the above mentioned massage last night and it was fabulous! Norm did a great job! If anyone is interested in a massage, he works for tips only to pay for things like sheets, oils, lotions and general student- type supplies that he needs. He will be official in November, I think, so you better hurry! :)

I got to talk to Lesley yesterday and she sounded great! She won't know more about the surgery results until next week, though. :( I am sending her best wishes for a speedy recovery! :)

I am now officially done with taxes... the federal ones are filed and the state ones (+ my Dad's) have been mailed! I am so relieved to have that done for another year!

Well, I need to get my butt outside and enjoy what is left of this beautiful spring day! Its supposed to rain for the next 5 days or something crazy like that so I need to say my goodbyes to the sunshine while I still can! Have a great night!

Why is being a parent so hard?

Why is it so hard to be a parent? Are things getting harder now because I have been blessed for too long? Or did I make some mistakes and this is some sort of karma coming back to bite me in the ass? I am beyond frustrated at the moment and need some time to think... to pray... to find the right solution to send my daughters on the right path.

Just a little something I stumbled on tonight and wanted to share...

A mother tries to provide her daughter with insight
into the important things in life
in order to make her life
as happy and fulfilling as possible.

A mother tries to teach her daughter
to be good, always helpful to other people
to be fair, always treating others equally
to have a positive attitude at all times
to always make things right when they are wrong
to know herself well
to know what her talents are
to set goals for herself
to not be afraid of working too hard to reach her goals.

A mother tries to teach her daughter
to have many interests to pursue
to laugh and have fun every day
to appreciate the beauty of nature
to enter into friendships with good people
to honor their friendships and always be a good friend
and to particularly respect and love our elder members
to use her intelligence all times
to listen to her emotions
to adhere to her values

A mother tries to teach her daughter
to not be afraid to stick to her beliefs
to not follow the majority when the majority is wrong
to carefully plan a life for herself
to vigorously follow her chosen path
to enter into a relationship with someone worthy of herself
to love this person unconditionally with her body and mind
to share all that she has learned in her life with this person

If I have provided you with an insight
into most of these things
then I have succeeded as a mother
in what I hoped to accomplish in raising you
if many of these slipped by
while we were all so busy
I have a feeling you know them anyway
One thing I am sure of though,
I have taught you to be proud of the fact
that you are a woman equal to all men and
that I have loved you every second of your life
I have supported you at all times
as a mother, as a person, and as a friend
I will always continue to Cherish and love
everything about you
my beautiful daughter.
Author: Susan Polis Schutz

You can let me back on now! ;)

I finished (and filed) our federal return. I also completed (and printed) the ME and MA state taxes. If Scott ever wants to work in 3 states in one year again- especially when one of them is Maine- I am simply going to have to put my foot down and say no! WHAT A FREAKIN' NIGHTMARE!

So, that took up like 6 hours of my day! I also did a little laundry and vacuumed. Not a whole lot of achievement in that but maintenance at least and that is better than I do some days.

My friend Lesley goes in for surgery on Tuesday. She has a brave front but I know she must be nervous. All I have to offer are my prayers so that is what I will give her. And maybe some HUGS if I see her this weekend... although that might freak her out because I am not a hugging person, LOL

Off to do a little reading before bed... have a great night! :)

Kick me off here if you see me......

If you are seeing this post, it means I am blogging rather than finish my taxes that I started last Friday! SO many other things on my to-do list require that I finish my taxes, so please-- I beg of you-- if you see me online, tell me to get the heck off! :)

So, who else is over on Facebook? There is a super fun application called Superlatives and I have to laugh because on more than one occasion I have been voted "Most likely to kick it with Jesus someday"! I am SO down with that! :) I am glad that despite my crazy outer shell, people know what I am really all about!

We attended the Rube Goldberg Fair at the school tonight. Dane and his friend worked hard on their invention- The Ultimate Mousetrap- and did a great job showing it off!

Hope you are all having a great week!